so im alive

i attempted suicide on tuesday and im currently in psych hiospital in edimburgh and i’ll be here for a week, then om gping to one in glashow and im not aure how long i’ll ne there for.
wpnt be on here much, hope youre all well!

so im alive

i’m sorry i’m sorry i’m sorry i’m sorry

i can’t breathe i just can’t handle it anymore i’m so sorry forgive me please

i’ve let you all down, i’m sorry!

i can’t physically wake up my dad because he’ll tell me to go to sleep then won’t be able to get back to sleep himself and he needs to wake up for work at 8am

if i phone up a hotline…i’m not even sure what i’d say. i want to die but i don’t? i want to take a shit load of pills but i don’t want to upset my dad? they’ll do there best to talk me down and won’t be able to and they’ll get tired of me

if i take the pills, i’ll end up in hospital and i do not want to go back there. i’ll just be taking up an extra bed and it will just make everything worse

i can’t breathe, my chest is tight and no amount of music is calming be down. i’m inches away from taking the pills but then i keep getting the thought of my dad finding me and i burst into tears

guys i don’t know what to do i don’t want the police coming to my house i can’t handle that but i am seriously so fucked right now 

i’m crying thank you all so much for your messages i don’t deserve them

i’m just lost lost and tempted and i can’t breathe and i want to talk to someone but they’ll just tell me to wake up my dad and i can’t and i don’t even know anymore i’m just done

i don’t know what to do i’m having a breakdown i can’t move from my desk if i do i’m afraid i might take them and i can’t go back to hospital and i don’t even know anymore guys i really don’t

it’s 4am and i can’t breathe and i just want to die i have 152 pills and i have never been more tempted than now to take them i can’t breathe

if i do and end up in hospital my dad is going to be exhausted and not at work and i can’t do that to him he needs the money

i don’t know what to do i want to take the pills but i don’t want to hurt my dad and omg i’m going to start bawling in a minute.

-laughbeforeyougrin:

Just because i feel like sharing again.

My tattoo is so beautiful !:)

Title: Skin+Bones
Artist: Lydia
Plays: 224

thesenightswillgosoquietly:

Lydia | Skin+Bones

I’ve been out of my mind for some time now,
but come on, you knew that
You knew where my head has been at,
yeah, but you’re still hoping it comes back

urbancatfitters:

got myself a new shirt check it out

bamzoo:

ahoyaustinn:

The Amity Affliction - Chasing Ghosts.

(x)

fiftyshadesofdevingray:

3rdrudy:

QUEEN VIVIEN